[CDATA[ And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream, until the end of time. My advice: just keep movin straight ahead. 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They own everything. May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. Men are often so foolish as to boast and value themselves upon their passions, even those that are most vicious. Here is one I would suggest: Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.George Carlin,When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops? Everyone smiles in the same language. George Carlin, 35. " George Carlin We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. Get future posts byemail,oryou can follow us onInstagram,Pinterest,andFacebook. Aw, hes a comedian. Its interested in its own power. How is it possible to have a civil war?George Carlin, When I ask how old your toddler is, I dont need to hear 27 months. Hes two will do just fine. Here are some of our favorite George Carlin quotes on politics. var gptAdSlots = gptAdSlots || []; Famous quotes on life, death, politics and of course the American government. Goalcast is an inspiring community for achievers dedicated to helping you improve all aspects of your life. Right in the f--in head! born on May 12, 1937, Or, at the very least, it will be slanted to suit them, and then rarely followed up. The larger the group, the more toxic, the more of your beauty as an individual you have to surrender for the sake of group thought. And just dumb enough to passively accept it., The government doesnt lie, it engages in disinformation., Im a loyal American and Im not happy unless I let the government and industry poison me a little bit every day., Government wants to control information and control language because thats the way you control thought, and basically thats the game theyre in., Bullshit is the glue that binds us as a nation., I believe the government should step in where the free market fails., Sooner or later the people in this country are going to realize: the government does not give a fuck about them., A flag is supposed to represent everything that a country does.. var url; apstag.init({ Press Enter / Return to begin your search. We hope these George Carlin quotes on life, religion and government will make you smile as well as share some important facts with you. Top George Carlin Quotes on Government, Marriage, Love, Life, Religion War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class young men off to die. Some people see the glass half full, others see it half empty. George Denis Patrick Carlin was born May 12, 1937, in the Bronx, New York. Like the boogie man. "Never argue with an idiot. All rights reserved. You have no choice. Government is an important institution. My first rule, I dont believe anything the government tells me And I dont take very seriously the media or the press in this country. George Carlin, 82. When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. Whats that, a bonus? stylesheet.rel = "stylesheet"; So, I dislike and despise groups of people but I love individuals. The politicians are put there to give you the idea you have freedom of choice. var e = document.createElement("script"); e.src = "https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/41mrkPcyPwL.js"; document.head.appendChild(e); George Carlin. var node = document.getElementsByTagName("script")[0]; I think the life cycle is all backwards. Nothing changed.George Carlin, Well, if crime fighters fight crime and firefighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?George Carlin, I think its the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately. 14 George Carlin Quotes on Education, Kids & Parents - Fatherly } You have owners. Whether you agree with him or not, George Carlins views on government are definitely worth considering. I see a glass thats twice as big as it needs to be. George Carlin, Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time. George Carlin, Careful, if you think too much, theyll take you away. George Carlin, I think people should be allowed to do what they want. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. George Carlin, 46. George Carlin, Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?George Carlin, Electricity is really just organized lightningGeorge Carlin, Would a fly without wings be called a walk?George Carlin, There are women named Faith, Hope, Joy, and Prudence. If you cant beat them, arrange to have them beaten. George Carlin, 47. "Men are from Earth,. The poor are just there just to scare the shit out of the middle class. //Welcome | QuoteSaga Seems like a big waste of time to me! Do share your thoughts with us in the comment section and tell us which one was your favoriteGeorge Carlin quotesor if you want to ask any questions or have any query send them viaContact Us. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money. George Carlin, 74. I think people should be allowed to do what they want. My motto: Fuck Hope! George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Im happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, If everyone in the world sat quietly at the same time, closed their eyes and concentrated as hard as they could on peace and goodwill, all the killing and cruelty in the world would continue. We and our partners use cookies to Store and/or access information on a device. Tax them. You and I are not in the big club. var cookies = document.cookie.split('; '); They own, and control the corporations. George Carlin 'Political correctness is fascism pretending to be manners.' Quotes are added by the Goodreads community and are not verified by Goodreads. Improve yourself, find your inspiration, share with friends, George Carlin (2002). By the way, it's the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. Careful, if you think too much, theyll take you away. George Carlin, 77. We made 'em up. " George Carlin Quotes "Most of the country was founded by slave owners so they could be free. The challenge is to find it. George Carlin, 17. The Grammy-Award-winning star of 14stand-up comedy specials on HBO taught us the power of words and how a person can use humor as a weapon. George Carlin - Quotes, Death & 7 Words - Biography Do not believe anything the government tells you - George Carlin Theres a humorous side to every situation. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. Laugh often, long and loud. " George Carlin Quotes When he is not writing in his favorite coffee shop, Igor spends most of his time reading, traveling, producing house music, and capturing light with his camera. Dont just teach your children to read Teach them to question everything that they read Teach them to question everything. George Carlin, 86. All you had to do was suspend the logic and reasoning you were being taught in all the other classes. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Laugh often, long and loud. American - Comedian May 12, 1937 - June 22, 2008. Your cat thinks the dog's an asshole. George Carlin We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. They own you. It presents itself as fairness, yet attempts to restrict and control peoples language with strict codes and rigid rules. George Carlin, 60. // The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. Before, all you had to go by were these 14 quotes. Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky. function isShowingBuyableFeatures() { But did you ever notice that we have no war on homelessness? The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. He is a sucker for good coffee, Indian food, and video games. Its what our system produces: Garbage in, garbage out. googletag.pubads().enableSingleRequest(); They should be more vivid. It creates a hostile work environment. Political correctness is Americas newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. Its never going to get any better. One can never know for sure what a deserted area can look like. George Carlin Quotes - Facebook If your kid needs a role model and you aint it, youre both fucked. George Carlin, 32. " Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. window.Mobvious.device_type = 'mobile'; The only country that could invade America is America! 5. Quote by George Carlin - SComedy Period. The game is rigged and nobody seems to notice. Did you ever stop to thnk about all the people we kill? Some people have to go to work and dont have time for all that. Interview with Todd Leopold, edition.cnn.com. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. George Carlin, 14. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. George Carlin, 43. var ue_sn = "www.goodreads.com"; Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. page: {requestId: "RW7VD4AVX1H9239WWVVN", meaningful: "interactive"} George Carlin Sayings and Quotes about life! TOP 25 QUOTES BY GEORGE CARLIN (of 976) | A-Z Quotes George Carlin, Dont just teach your children to readTeach them to question what they read.Teach them to question everything.George Carlin, How can He be perfect? Sooner or later the people in this country are going to realize: the government does not give a f**k about them. googletag.enableServices(); Disclaimer: As an Amazon Associate We earn from qualifying purchases. The first one is: 'Never believe ANYthing the government says.' George Carlin Believe, Government, Rules To Live By 48 Copy quote Tell people an invisible man in the sky created all things, they believe you. A.src = t; And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid." 2. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating and you finish off as an orgasm.George Carlin, Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist.George Carlin, I do this real moron thing, and its called thinking. There is only a short pause before the next horrifying event. People cant seem to get it through their heads that there is never any healing or closure. gads.async = true; It's what our system produces: Garbage in, garbage out. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("resource", "author_22782"); a[a9] = { try { The main reason Santa is so jolly is that he knows where all the bad girls live. Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. What if I want to have a crappy day?George Carlin, Not only do I not know whats going on, I wouldnt know what to do about it if I did.George Carlin, Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.George Carlin, So, have a little fun. I think people should be allowed to do what they want. - George Carlin profile quotes. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. George Carlin was one of the most iconic comedians of all time and he had a lot to say about government. It seems only right. Vicious Quotes Page 5. . In this blog post, weve compiled some of his most compelling quotes on the subject for you to consider as well! We have the war on crime, the war on cancer, the war on drugs. Its a great feeling. var ue_mid = "A1PQBFHBHS6YH1"; I dont have to tell you it goes without saying there are some things better left unsaid. Trouble is, most of them suck. (function() { Its disgusting, man. If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind that Hitler was elected in a full, free democratic election. George Carlin, 66. //George Carlin Shitting on Government for 8 Minutes Straight And apparently Im not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions.George Carlin, Im completely in favor of theseparation of Church and State. These two institutions screw us up enoughon their own, so both of them together iscertain death.George Carlin, I dont have pet peeves I have major psychotic fucking hatreds.George Carlin, I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.George Carlin, If your kid needs a role model and you aint it, youre both fucked. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Its important in life if you dont give a shit. Actually, I think that class was called Religion. In this blog post, well take a look at some of his best quotes on the subject. Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain, All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another, "It's harder to be funny from the position of power. George Carlin political quotes may seem sensitive, but they inspire necessary conversations. The less said about it the better. George Carlin, 38. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. } Never argue with an idiot. Thats the problem.George Carlin, Let a smile be your umbrella, and youll end up with a face full of rain. //]]> } googletag.pubads().setTargeting("sid", "osid.b75ee1b4ab41ae6cecc3e4c769a5b3df"); Thats exactly what I want you to think. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. If holy people are so interested in politics, government, and public policy, let them pay the price of admission like everybody else. Dont look for it. Theres only the immediate future and the recent past. George Carlin, 22. They own everything. He was an American standup comedian. Lists. Laugh until you gasp for breath.George Carlin, The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.George Carlin, Honesty may be the best policy, but its important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.George Carlin, People always tell me Have a nice day. Well what if I dont want to? We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass. George Carlin, 79. The late great comedian George Carlin has many great quotes about life and society, here are some of them. The people are fucked! George Carlin, 80. googletag.pubads().disableInitialLoad(); If you can find a solution to homelessness where the corporations and politicians can make a few million dollars each, you will see the streets of America begin to clear up pretty damn quick! George Carlin, 67. In America, anyone can become president. I started this website because I wanted to help people like you to maximize their potential and achieve their dreams. They all said: 'Try to live together peacefully.' When you are born in America, you get a front row seat. You have owners. I hate a group of people with a 'common purpose'. On The Simple Solution To Parenthood's Most Difficult Question "Parents are burning these kids out on structure. When you step on the brakes, your life is in your foots hands. 21 George Carlin Quotes On Government And Politics Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.. If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. George Carlin, 42. Carlin was known for his dark comedy and reflections on politics, religion, psychology, language and taboo subjects. a[a9]._Q.push([c, r]) Just daydreaming. Dont just teach your children to read Teach your children to question what they read, teach them to question everything. In America, anyone can become president. George Carlin > Quotes (?) Every person you look at; you can see the universe in their eyes, if you're really looking. Religion class was always an easy class. Let me know in the comments below and please share this post. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death. Cause pretty soon they have little hats. Showing 1-30 of 421 "The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept." George Carlin tags: humor , insanity , lies , lying , self-indulgence , truth 19588 likes Like "The planet is fine. The upper class: keeps all of the money, pays none of the taxes. If no one knows when a person is going to die, how can we say he died prematurely? I look at war a little. Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure. I sincerely believe that if you think theres a solution, youre part of the problem. He was born May 12, 1937, in New York City into an Irish Catholic family, but he rejected the faith. And probably increase.George Carlin, And heres something else, another problem you might have: Suppose your prayers arent answered. Let George Carlin Inspire You! #shorts #georgecarlin #motivataion # Whether you agree with him or not, Carlins views are definitely worth considering. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and his thoughts on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. the important thing is to, first of all, question everything you read or hear or see or are told.
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